Hi, my name is D and this is my writings on subjects. I'm no rapscallion or anything at all. If you want to you can read my writings on subjects if you have free time. If you want to argue with me or call me names then please comment. Negative feedback is very welcome...I love dat shit. Me? I'm not even a noun, I'm a fucking verb, dude.

Saturday, March 26, 2011

Rock and Roll concerts I saw one time...

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 George Clinton (once)
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    A group of aged men and women came on the stage, none of whom I identified as being George Clinton, they dwelved deep down into the funk, the whole funk and nothing but the funk so help us god. They burst through the funk-o-liciousness of the P-Funk and the full bodiment of the funkoplasm covered the room up good. Then they gave a toast to their dead friend who apparently wore a diaper and nothing else during performances...

...then they introduced the legend himself, the King of Funk, George Clinton. He was dressed modestly and not overly funky. He looked like an aging funk hermit...who came out of his eternal funk cave resting place for one final funk explosion.

He had difficulty remembering words and timings. He looked out of shape yet this 70 year old man exuded more funky particles and funk-o-lectrons then anyone else. When he began his Maggot Brain opening statement before Mr. Hampton took over for a 10 minute guitar solo I began feeling emotional. I really like that little poem at the start of Maggot Brain and seeing him say it a directly in front of me was actually kind of emotional for me. I felt real raw dirty funk...

Trivial memories:

-a couple hot chicks danced with me briefly and gave me a resounding high five.

-George Clinton saw the waiter going through the crowd with a tray of beers and called for his attention, the whole crowd gestured for the waiter to take notice and he turned and handed Clinton a beer and then everyone cheered.

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Oliver Mtukudzi and friends (once)
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Oliver Mtukudzi in concert was a very enjoyable experience.

He played with Habib Koité, Afel Bocoum, and 6 Mali players. It was very good, they were in unison and played together, danced together and sang together. They are funny too, they introduced the next song always with a interjection of comedy or an anecdote.

They had some instruments I've never seen before like the balafons and the drummer had an extra piece on his drum set which was this wooden globe. Some of the guitars were ones I've never seen before or know the name of and they sounded really good.

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Jello Biafra and the Guantanamo School of Medecine (once)
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Biafra had not appeared in Montreal since 1986 with the Dead Kennedys. When I was 18 I bought a Dead Kennedys t shirt and wore it around a lot, I stopped wearing it when some people at John Abbott mistook the symbol for being something skin head related but of course it represented something very opposite of that mentality. I dug it out of my garage and put it on under a sweater before going to the carpet store I worked at during that time. When I got out of work and went to the concert I threw my sweater on some table and bought beer and moshed with crazy kids to Let's Lynch the Landlord, California Uber Alles, Holiday in Cambodia, Come on Bleed, and Police Truck.

During Police Truck the aged and very sweaty Biafra jumped off stage and right into me while we were moshing around....that was kind of memorable I must say.

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D.O.A. (numerous times)
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The best time I saw D.O.A. was thanksgiving day of 2010. I showed up late and tickets were sold out and they wouldn't let me bribe my way in or sneak in. When all hope was about lost and I was ready to pack up and go home Joey Shithead checked in the bar and I started talking to him. Many words later, we agreed that if I bought him one beer upstairs he'd put me on his guestlist and get me upstairs...

"Yo one more for Guestlist...."

Upstairs I bought Shithead a pint of beer and asked him about his recent travels to China. When they went on stage I went to the front...there were two Qubecois metal acts that opened and the crowd was very very rowdy that night. One kid that I was talking to before got up on stage and jumped off i caught and propelled him into the crowd and it was cool. I became the designated lifter to get people crowd surfing after that as everyone wanted to do it after they saw one monkey do it. I launched like 40 people into the air that night and it was really fucking fun.

This one chick was being moshed with inappropriately by a male and she started punching him right in the face. I like when chicks are cool like that.

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The Residents (once)
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The Residents are fucking weird but there's some deep raw honesty about their lyrics, and fantastic absurdity and originality to their shtick, that I just can't get enough of these effing mystery men.

There were these two crack heads who were smoking crack pipes right in front of me and they smelled like urine. I don't know how they managed to get in but at the time they were really annoying and if you watch any youtube vids from this concert you can hear them yelling at innoppurtune times through the whole song. Now their smell and annoying behaviour just helps me remember the concert very clearly so I guess I have to thank them.

The lead Resident's voice is so unique and odd that I want to absorb some of it into the way I talk and his mannerisms are cool too.

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Devo (once)
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Devo's shtick is pretty original as well, they are dudes from the future who are coming back to our time to tell us to be smarter and cooler in our day-to-day lives. Their show had a big screen backdrop that had video to accompany the performance, at one point the electricity gave out and the screen died but they kept going with flashlights because they are pretty good people. I danced with a young lady and we sang "Mongoloid" together and everyone had a great time as such.

The one knock on these guys is that they were hawking their "energy dome" chachkies for 30 bucks a pop, that's 30 bucks for a plastic hat. Mark Mothersbaugh was throwing them into the crowd for free though after as well as towels, and then it got sorta tongue in cheek and he started throwing towels that he wiped his butt with (over his pants though no worries) and then the dude that sings "Secret Agent Man" was throwing the dilapidated duct tape that held his mic to his mic stick into the throng of screaming Devo devotees who wanted souvenirs.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qhPvd1zMLN0&feature=fvst

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Hanson Brothers (coupla times)
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In 2001 I went to my first real punk rock show and it was the best. Everyone was throwing beer EVERYWHERE, people were jumping off the top deck into the mosh pit, one jumper left in a stretcher...it was nuts.

I knew every word to all their god damn silly songs too. I left a man after the show hanging on a high five cause I was tired and not really thinking about high fives in those days...I vowed never to leave a brother hanging ever again at that moment and have never done so since.

We're Bad! So Baaaaaaaaad! We're Bad! I believe this in my HEART and I believe this in my Soul but we will never live long enough to kno-ow! Cause We're Bad!

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